Be a Katie? I’m Skeptical

There’s something I should get out the way immediately, I wasn’t a fan of Katie Thurston on Matt’s season of The Bachelor and I’m still trying to do the mental math to understand how someone who came in tenth (?) place is about to be on our screens in a matter of days as the lead.

Katie reminds me of every white girl from rom coms growing up. She’s conventionally pretty, slightly awkward, did exactly one noble thing that’s supposed to erase any harm she may have caused, and she’s “quirky” becuase she brought a vibrator to Nemacolin on night one.

To say the least, I’m not impressed. Not when there were plenty of women of color in Matt’s top ten, eight, six, that production could’ve chosen from.

Katie being picked feels like production said “we gave you TWO Black leads back to back, damn, be grateful!” as if we haven’t watched the human equivalent of Crest White Strips compete for love for the last two decades.

So yeah, not particularly excited about Katie, but I am excited that my Monday nights will be occupied again and very excited for Bachelor in Paradise and Michelle’s season of The Bachelorette that will follow. I’m also hoping Katie will surprise me, similar to Hannah Brown’s season. We all thought that was going to be a train wreck (and it was), but it was cool to watch her growth throughout the process and her season gave us plenty of drama, and the Mike Johnson. Maybe Katie’s season will yield similar results. We’ll see.

In the mean time, I wanted to rank my personal top three guys, the top three guys I think Katie will go for (based solely on the fact that all I know about her is that she owns a purple vibrator) and some predictions for the season.

BK’s Top Three

I’ve listened to all the “Meet the Men” podcast episodes, stalked all the Instagrams, and perused the ABC cast bios and have picked out my top three men. It’s worth mentioning that since these guys are my type, they probably won’t do too hot on this particular show, or in this franchise, but best of luck to them anyway.

Andrew Spencer

Photo by ABC

Andrew is a pro football player in Vienna, Austria. We love a well travelled king who plays sports! I won’t lie, Andrew’s turtleneck is what caught my eye. I feel like people are really hating on guys in turtlenecks lately, but honestly, they’re having a moment and I’m here for it, especially under a blazer.

I also love that when in the States, he spends his time in Chicago, one of the best cities in the country (and where I currently reside). He’s also close with his grandmother, which same. Lastly, Andrew swears he makes a fantastic margarita and while the jury is still out on whether that’s true or not, I love the confidence!

Kyle Howard

Photo by ABC

Kyle is a technical recruiter in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, but more important than that, he looks like Carl Radke from Summer House, and Carl Radke from Summer House is very hot.

Beyond Kyle being a baby doppelgänger for one of the most attractive men on reality TV right now, he describes himself as a hopeless romantic, which is how I would describe myself too. He’s looking for a rom com kind of love, which is slightly problematic and unrealistic, but we’ll take what we can get. Best of luck Kyle!

David Scott

Photo by ABC

Honestly, I struggled to pick a third guy. Their ABC bios make them all sound basic and we know that the ABC headshots never do any of these men favors. I picked David as my third favorite becuase 1) he’s got the same name as my actual boo (🥰) and 2) he’s got a nice beard. Yes, the bar is in hell.

I like that he was on his high school’s debate team and per his Instagram, is currently in grad school now, so to me that means he’s a smart guy.

Unfortunately, he (and many of the other men from this season) has scrubbed his Instagram so much it’s hard to get a feel for who he actually is. I see David fading into the background for a bit, but then being part the last group of guys sent home.

Katie’s Top Three (According to me)

I don’t really feel like I know who Katie is because we didn’t see much of her on Matt’s season. Producers are really pushing this “she stands up to bullies” thing, so I guess I’ll buy that. We also know she’s sex positive and popular on TikTok. So, I’m thinking Katie wants someone who’s more low-key. I get the vibe that she likes to be close to, but not completely, the center of attention and so she needs a guy who is ok with being in the public eye by association, but for the most part, does his own thing and lets her shine (think Brian and Rachel Lindsay or Zac and Tayshia).

Marcus Lathan

Photo by ABC

Marcus is perfect for Katie. He lives in the Pacific Northwest, so does Katie, he’s successful in his career as a real estate broker and he’s an ‘amazing’ (his words) lover, which has got to be a step up from Thurston’s purple dildo! He just seems like a career oriented guy that would be down for whatever, which I think Katie would be into.

Spoiler Pick–if you don’t want to know anything about the season going in, skip

Normally, I don’t do spoilers of any kind, but this one has been mentioned on so many Bach podcasts and he’s in a promo for the season, so, I’m talking about it.

It’s been widely reported that Canadian Blake Moynes from Clare/Tayshia’s season will be back to vy for Thurston’s heart and I am here for it! In short, both Blake and Katie are clearly down to do it for the ‘Gram and the Tok, which sounds like a lucrative relationship to me 🤑!

John Hersey

John is a self-proclaimed thrill seeker, which means dude is fucking crazy. His most recent post on Instagram is him willingly jumping out of a hot air balloon. Nuff said.

He’s a bartender in the San Diego, California area and seems like a fun hang. His ABC bio says he doesn’t like it when people disrespect others, which aligns great with Katie’s no bullying policy. Perhaps these two could be a match!

Predictions

Despite my skepticism, I do think Katie’s season has the potential to be a pleasant surprise. The producers may not be the best at matchmaking, but through trial and manipulation, they give us the drama! I also remember a lot of Matt’s contestants saying Katie was made for this show/process, which I don’t think is compliment, but I do think it is telling that sis is a little messy and knows how to give the audience what we want. Here’s what I’m thinking will go down:

Katie will be ruthless when it comes to sending men home.

I don’t think Katie is going to put up with the bullshit and when men come to her with accusations of who is and isn’t there “for the right reasons” I think she’ll waste no time giving them the boot. We’ve already seen multiple teasers with her saying the phrase “for the right reasons.”

Katie’s pick will be very clear, potentially from the beginning.

Leads often talk about falling in love with multiple people before making their final decision, I don’t think this will be a problem for Thurston. While I’m not expecting a Clare/Dale ending, I do think she’ll feel confident in her pick from the beginning and really gravitate towards him in a way that is hard for the audience to ignore.

I don’t think Katie is engaged.

Between Thurston’s protective “be kind” insta post a few weeks ago, to her now random social media break just days before her season, I don’t get the vibe that this is someone who is engaged, or happily with someone. They could be working things out, or maybe they’re dating and not yet engaged, but it’s just a feeling I have. Who knows?

We’ll all find out soon enough, Katie Thurston’s season of The Bachelorette airs Monday, June 7 on ABC! I’ll be live tweeting and recapping every wacky limo entrance, tears shed, and “for the wrong reasons” accusation. So, see you on Twitter Monday night and see you back here Tuesday! ✌🏾